Sorry for the lack of activeness on here. I’m still keeping up with my healthy lifestyle, but I’ve just been busy, and going through some unfortunate crap. Life likes to dump on me a lot.
Back on the 2nd I had made an update post about how I found a guy, and although I tried not to get my hopes up too much about it, I did, because he was just too amazing. He made me feel amazing. He made me feel beautiful. He made me feel wanted. I knew all this was too good to be true, but I just thought maybe life decided it would be kind to me for once.
Our first week together was BEYOND amazing, but the 2nd week, no so much. I didn’t see him at all. I asked him if everything was okay between us and he reassured me things were fine but that he was just stressed and tired from work. He promised he would see me the following week (last week), but again, didn’t see him. I kept thinking maybe he had found someone else or that he had lost interest in me, but then he would send me sexy texts and stuff which suggested he was still interested in me. Regardless of those texts, on that weekend I sent him an e-mailed expressing my concerns about us. I told him I never expected to be with him 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, but not seeing him at all wasn’t working for me. I said that I was worried if we didn’t get back into the groove of things that we’d drift apart and lose interest in each other completely.
He finally got around to reading the e-mail this past Tuesday, and that’s when he told me he’s not looking to be in a relationship of any sort; he just wanted to be friends with benefits. He said he still cares about me and everything, but he just didn’t want things to turn into something he’s not ready for yet. He apologized for leading me on for so long and that he never meant to hurt me.
I was crushed. I couldn’t help but feel stupid for thinking I meant more to him than just a friend with benefits (even though he is the one that lead me on to believe so). After a couple days of complete shittery though, I got over the hurt of him leading me on, and just really started to miss him.
On Thursday night, I actually messaged him on Facebook asking if there was any way at all we could make things work out … what we had going on was too amazing, and it just seems like such a waste to throw that all away because of misunderstanding. I suggested maybe we could take things slower and let it eventually grow into something more than just friends with benefits, but said that if he was completely over me, then I would delete him from Facebook, Tumblr, and lose his number so I could never contact him again. He hasn’t responded even though he’s been on FB since then, and he’s still actually friends with me on there, and he’s still following me on personal Tumblr … even liking some of my posts! I really don’t know what to make of that?
As confused as I am by the fact he’s still following me and whatnot, I’m guessing he’s really not willing to try and work things out. I find it quite sad that he would rather have a bunch of meaningless friends with benefits rather than be with one loyal girl who would love him like crazy. It’s his loss ultimately, but I still do miss him. I’ll get over it in time.
So that’s what’s been going on in my life.
I hope you guys are all doing well at least :)
(Source: iwillbebeautifulandthin)
I’ve officially lost 100 lbs!
Well, 103 lbs to be exact :) My housemate and I bought a scale and it said 147 lbs so sometime within the past two months I hit the 100 mark!
OMG…I look almost exactly like her before (except shorter I think). AMAZING MOTIVATION!!!!
damn! get it girlll.
you’re great!!!
(Source: shall-this-url-be-mine)
(Source: curvecreation)
(Source: onto-step2)
If you’re ever in need of a quote to give you a kick in the ass, look no further than Muhammad Ali.
